Well, here we are! 2020 is almost over. Last year at this time, I rounded up my top five reads of the year in both nonfiction and fiction categories and wrote two posts about them. I think it is a good way to look back and reflect on what made an impact. I have meet my reading goal for the year, which was one more than the previous year. Even though supporting two distance learners meant I did not read/listen as much during the week, one can tell looking at my full list that I dove in and indulged for the sake of distraction. Another thing that confirms this is that my reading this year has been noticeably fiction-heavy. No regrets whatsoever. It's been the longest year in most people's living memory and whether I was processing deep issues or looking for blissful distraction, books have been more essential than ever to me personally. Even if non fiction was somewhat less prominent, there have been quite a few excellent reads, so no trouble putting together the top five.
Raising Human Beings, by Dr Ross Greene. Have I mentioned my new friend, Dr Greene? If we have spoken about kids, I probably have. This was not the first book of his I read, that was The Explosive Child. The title of it makes the focus and application sound much narrower than it actually is, but I still prefer Raising Human Beings, even though it covers a lot of the same topics. This book is not just my top five fiction this year, it's actually my top parenting book of all time. It's validating, it makes sense, its usefulness easily overflows from parent-child relationships to relationships in general. It does require an open mind if you are a proponent of traditional parenting values.
The New Jim Crow: Mass Incarceration in the Age of Colorblindness by Michelle Alexander. One thing this book has in common with the previous one is that it's bigger than it sounds. Mass incarceration influences more than you may think, it is caused by more than you think, and it means more than you think. If you've ever wondered why the justice system is so broken, how racism is so pervasive, read this book. Especially read it if you are white. Yes, even if you are or have been poor. I would even say read this before White Fragility. It explains history and context in a way that makes it all come together in an immense, intricate, all encompassing, and horrifying picture. If you are learning about race issues, this is a must read.
The Body Keeps the Score: Brain, Mind and Body in the Healing of Trauma by Bessel A Van der Kolk. As far as popular psychology goes, it is my entirely subjective observation that trauma is the new anxiety. It's a popular topic for psychology blogs articles and self help books. I'm fine with trends. They tend to bring a topic to the foreground and increase understanding. If sometimes a slight too many things are assigned to it, it's not good, but it's worth the benefit of accessibility of information about something that impacts a lot of people. I do think it's not a moment too soon to learn more about trauma. It did take me months to get through this book, leaving it and reading other things, and coming back when I felt ready to process the content. As you might guess, there are plenty of mentions of trauma in this book which are bound to be hard or impossible to read for many. I wish they would come up with a more trigger friendly version... if that's even possible. Bottom line is that this book contains priceless knowledge about how our brains process trauma, how it can be carried in the most unexpected ways and even mentions another new pet topic of mine: Interoception.
A Promised Land by Barack Obama. Oh, man. This audiobook is almost thirty hours and it's only half of his expected memoir material from presidential years. Honestly, I would have not taken anything out. I suppose there's no way to keep politics out of this part, but I don't really care. Though in no way perfect, President Obama is a brilliant man with a gift for words, with a rare perspective, and his account is quite enthralling to read, even better if you listen to the audiobook narrated by him personally. I wouldn't even know where to start on individual parts of the book, so I will just share one of my favorite moments. It was when the phone rang very early in the morning with someone on his staff telling him he had been awarded the Nobel Prize for peace. When he hung up the phone, dazed, Michelle asked what it was about. He said he won the Nobel Peace prize, and Michelle said: That's great, honey, then rolled over and went back to sleep. And speaking of Michelle Obama, as a bonus recommendation, also read her book, Becoming.
Leaders Around Me: Autobiographies of Autistics who Type, Point and Spell to Communicate by Edlyn Vallejo Pena. This is a must have library item for anyone interested in Autism and Disability in general. If you have read The Reason I Jump, and thought it rare that someone is capable of really complex thought but unable to communicate in conventional ways, this book will show you otherwise. Also keep this in mind for anyone looking to read about Autism from an Autistic perspective, especially that of Autistics with high support needs. Something that most people have a hard time with is understanding how discrepant different skills can be in the same individual. You know how you are really good at languages but you suck at math, right? There are people who write books who need help with activities of daily living. We may even understand this on a rational level, but still expect people around us to have relatively similar levels of skills for most things. I know first hand how hard can be to actually absorb this knowledge and live the words: "presume competence". I think reading about people who defy expectations can only do us good.
As always, I'm happy to exchange thoughts or expand on any of these or other books. Happy Solstice!
